Thursday, November 03, 2011

Kindergarteners are ridiculous

I volunteer in Harry's class, and today I could hear raised little voices spilling into the hallway on my approach (in wide-leg jeans that are so long I can only wear them with booties that have a giant wedge heel, but I don't want to get them hemmed because they are only INTERIM JEANS and hemming them feels like an admission that my ass will always be this big). It sounded like the kids were instructing the teacher, an unusual twist. Maybe it's opposite day, I thought, considering how such a day would rock Harry's routine world. Not quite. They had a sub, and Harry and the rest of the whiny gap-tooths were making sure she did absolutely everything exactly like their real teacher does every day, so help her. They use dashes when they write the date, not slashes! She should not pass out the paper for writing workshop-- they get their own! The tutor basket is blue, not pink! I looked at the teacher over 17 self-righteous heads. "They're so cute?" I said. "I am only here for the morning," she replied.

Harry brought home a turkey with the instructions to do a family art project and disguise the turkey to keep him safe from ending up as someone's main Thanksgiving course.

We all helped Harry make Super Turkey

Jack ate 2 fruit-like substances yesterday-- craisins and apple cider. A red letter day for him. (He also ate TJ's jarred peaches at dinner! More fruit than he's ever had in a day)

We've also been making a conscious effort o do more puzzles with him-- he's been puzzle deprived

Coop fell asleep during tummy time, and Ben made fun of him.


  1. Tripod11:36 AM

    I love it! "our teacher is nicer than you. Our teacher lets us talk. Our teacher is prettier than you ...."
    It would be so hard to be a sub for kids at that stage of
    Great art project

  2. OMG I've spent an hour in an elementary school classroom and there is not enough money in the world. Those teachers are amazing. I'll take my apathetic twenty-year-olds any day.

    Haha, funny Cooper pictures!

  3. hahaha!!! Super Turkey is awesome!

    I volunteer in Ethan's class every Friday for 3-3.5 hours and by the end of the time, my head is spinning. 5-6 year olds are serious business about their routines. And they are blisteringly honest when they see you falling short in some way. Its super!

    i would totally fall asleep during tummy time, too.