Old Lady

 I had an 18-day menstrual cycle, you guys. This means if the calendar falls just right, I could start having 2 periods some months. HOW AWESOME IS THAT? Not awesome at all. Some of my well-meaning, white, cisgender, upper-middle-class friends are panicking about reproductive rights and insisting everyone should delete all period tracking apps. I am not going to do that (because I have been studying this stuff for a long time, and people like me can likely still exercise our reproductive freedoms and have been able to pretty freely even as Roe has been slowly eroding. We don’t need to panic selfishly and talk Handmaid’s Tale; we need to open our checkbooks and follow the lead of tireless reproductive justice actors, if you want my opinion), but it would be nice of me to keep track of my cycle on the family calendar so everyone can know what they’re in for and we can teach the kids about kairos. Perimenopause is terrible.

Speaking of aging! My eyes have taken a serious downturn and I am for real wearing the reading glasses I have had a prescription for for YEARS because suddenly I need them. If I weren’t embroiled in so many inappropriate text threads, I would make my phone font bigger.

Maybe it’s because I am an elderly parent, but I don’t actually care where Minnie eats. I do care what (that gross pile on her plate is a shredded apple because she least like an iguana) she eats, though and when. She is very very picky about her clothes, so once she selects her outfit for the day, she is loathe to change it. So, I really want her eating breakfast BEFORE she gets dressed. I also want her to have actual breakfast food, not just a snack on the go. This means she eats some meals on the couch in front of Super Why. PICK YOUR BATTLES, I guess.

Definitely a lizard plate.