Don’t treat a gift like a burden is my very favorite piece of advice from the Happier in Hollywood podcast. It’s so universal; you definitely do not have to be a TV writer to take this tidbit to heart. I have been feeling very put upon lately about dragging Cooper (and Minnie! SHE’S THE HARD ONE) to campus every single weekday for two hours for diving practice. I was so happy to have a break this week because the pool was closed due to staffing issues. But then! I was telling a couple of other moms at practice how glad I was to have a break, and I could tell mid-sentence that I was missing something because of the looks on their faces. I was missing something: an email from the coach who was happy to report that staffing issues had somehow disappeared. BAH HUMBUG.
Soooooo, I tried for a reframe.
First of all, how awesome is it that Cooper has found a sport that he loves that happens to have state-of-the-art-facilities and a D1 college coach available to him right in his own back yard? (I mean. It’s actually a really awkward distance from our house especially with summer road construction, so dropping him off and going home is not really a great option since I would just basically have time to get settled at home and then start the process of warning Minnie that we are about to make a transition, transitioning Minnie, and driving back to campus to search for parking. So back yard is an overstatement.)
Second, how terrific that we can make room in our lives and our budget for club fees and cross-country travel.
Third, how amazing that he qualified for nationals (only 3 kids in the whole club did) and needs a bunch of extra practice.
Finally, how great is it to have free time on my beautiful campus with my favorite toddler. We can go to any number of top notch local coffee shops for drinks and treats. The best ice cream in the state (yeah, I said it) is at our student union. We can see master works in the campus art museum and real dinosaur bones at the geology museum. We can go bowling. We can take a quick stroller ride up State Street to the capitol or the main branch of our public library. We can drop him off and drive to the zoo or Trader Joe’s or Whole Foods (for dill pickle salad). We can pack a lunch and hunker down on the bleachers to watch Coop’s team practice and also see UW Badger divers who practice with the kids. And we can do this EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK.
We’re so lucky!
This is an excellent reminder! And love all the photos of Minnie!
ReplyDeleteThanks :)
DeleteWhat a perfect reframe! And I'm LOVING The Whispers, BTW. I could barely put it down and as you said--lots of interesting stuff about mothering and motherhood too.
ReplyDeleteOoooh— glad you like it. Try The Push, too!
DeleteI love the elephant and piggie photo op thing! Paul would love that as he adores those books! I definitely have Gerald vibes (prone to worrying) and he's more of the excited happy Piggie character. Ha.
ReplyDeleteI like this phrase from the Happier podcast, too. For me, it applies to life with a todder. The toddler stage is so very challenging for me. It's the hardest of all the stages I've experienced. But I know the challenging behavior is developmentally appropriate and it's made worse by all the changes he's experiencing so I try to keep that in mind. But gosh it's hard.
I am Gerald all the way. It is especially hard, I think, to have a toddler AND another small kid. A toddler with a whole gaggle of tweens and teens? Not very hard because I have so many helpers.
DeleteGreat reframing of the situation, Sarah. I think about that line A LOT. Such great advice.
ReplyDeleteAlso - what fabulous pictures of Minnie and diving and summer fun <3
She is a very agreeable toddler— LUCKILY
DeleteThis is what I remind myself whenever I'm exercising. I get to do this! Not I have to do this!
ReplyDeleteYes— such a good exercise mindset!
DeleteIt is a good reframe, although I might slightly reshape it to 'try to see the gift in the burden', merely because I am so on guard against toxic positivity, and sometimes it IS a burden as well as a gift. But then I am a very easily overwhelmed woman and your mileage may vary. :) I do agree that getting to hang at all those places with a delicious toddler is absolutely a gift, and go Cooper.
ReplyDeleteAGREE. It IS still a burden, especially in the context of work/life balance and how to split jobs with a partner (like, on the days Ben works from home, he does not have to sit there with Minnie— like I do— because I meet Coop there from my office)
DeleteLove the reframe, Sarah!
ReplyDeleteIt's always about perspective. Love it, Sarah!
ReplyDeleteThank you for this. I'm trying - desperately - to shift my perspective of something work-related that's really challenging right now. Having this saying might just help me get there. (And omg, don't come up to Whole Foods unless you want to sit on University for days... aggghhh...)
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