Random updates

From my bathroom window this morning, I watched Jack go to his summer enrichment class at school, and he skipped the whole way there.  The whole way.  Seven is cartoon-cute, and lucky lady that I am, I have 2 more sevens to look forward to.

Alabama Shakes is great.  Particularly "Don't Wanna Fight," but I love the whole Sound and Color album.

Cooper still-- at almost 4 years old (in September)-- does not like to poop in the potty.  He will take off his underwear, put on a pull-up, do his thing, and politely request help changing himself.  All of that seems way harder than pooping in the toilet.  To me anyway.

Dorothy likes to drink the pool.  No, for serious.  She thinks it is delicious.

She is just generally the funniest little person ever.  It's fun to hang out with her because she is so chatty and generally agreeable.  She also has the ability to spot a piece of Frozen merch from a mile away.  No way am I going to be able to get her a cute little Lands End monogrammed backpack to match everyone else's for school next year.  Nope-- a $19.99 glittery Target special with Anna and Elsa on the pocket is screaming her name.  I ordered her a Frozen beach towel last night n Amazon so she will stop trying to steal kids' towels at the pool.  She wears her costume dresses almost everyday.  And!  She will only drink from a Dora cup and wear Thomas the Train diapers.  She asked me for more princess diapers from "Caco"(Costco) and I thought the way she said the store was so cute, I wanted to hear it again.  I said, "Where are your diapers from?" She was confused and said "My butt."  Ha!

Harrison is taking a break from organized sports because the soccer  and lacrosse seasons are over, and we just couldn't commit to 4-day-a-week baseball after coming off six months of 4-day-a-week hockey.  He has hockey practice on Wednesdays and that's it.  I think the lack of team play is driving him crazy, but he is filling the void with daily swimming lessons and hours and hours and hours of basketball in the driveway with a little wiffle ball thrown in for good measure.  He has also rigged up a dummy goalie made of skateboards and assorted garage crap to hang out in his hockey net at the end of the driveway so he can practice shooting the puck higher into the net.  He's excited for soccer and hockey to start back up again and flag football, the love of his life since we won't let him play tackle yet.

He also finally FINALLY learned how to dive off the diving board-- he has spent the last 3 years straightening up mid-jump.

As you can see, Beatrix is as rowdy as ever.

And wonderful Ben is still wonderful.  He grilled salmon burgers in a lightening storm and then wrapped them in CSA lettuce leaves and chopped up all kinds of fresh veggie garnish and made me a Bacardi and Diet Coke because he knew I was hangry and had already counted my dinner calories and wouldn't be able to cope well with a menu change, despite the weather.

It is too cold here (mid 70s) for me to take the little kids to the pool because no way in hell am I getting in the water even though the pool heat is high, and the water is at least 85 degrees   So we have had to find other things to do with our days.

Luckily, we have swim lessons every morning, where I sit shivering in the sun in a sweatshirt and all 4 crazy kids swim-- 3 in lessons and Dorothy splashing in the shallow end.

Cooper fell down in the parking lot the other morning on the way in, and he tried to swim, but his skinned knee was just too much for him.  He also told me and Ben he could walk because of his "really, really, really bad owie," and we were concerned for a few seconds before we realized he's a huge baby.  But doesn't he look grown up (except, you know, for the pacifier)?

Oh, and also, Dorothy got a new bikini:

But I feel like an asshole putting her in it during the day when the boys are wearing LONG SLEEVES, so she has only worn it at night.  We love taking the ikds to the pool after dinner.  Neither Ben nor I gets in; we just hover by the side and watch Cooper swim (floaty vest free thanks to lessons) and Dorothy bob in her Puddle Jumper while Harry and Jack jump off the board and go don the slide, respectively.  Jack remains terrified of the diving board and Harry is too cool for the slide.  he likes to infuriate everyone in line behind him by inching down centimeter by centimeter.

Yesterday morning, I was on my GAME.  I made pancakes (plain and chocolate chip) and bacon WHILE THE KIDS WALKED THE DOG.  Why can't I be that awesomely efficient on real school mornings?

In the afternoon, the kids and I went to the zoo.  I love our sweet little free zoo, and its newly renovated arctic area is truly great.  But because it is free, it's always PACKED.  And yesterday we spent $10 riding the train and another $10 on TERRIBLE photo booth pics.   So, not quite free.

We came upon these little gray donkeys with black striped legs, a recent addition, and Harry said with great authority, "Those are zorses.  They are part zebra, part horse, and they cannot breed."  I TOTALLY believed him and was excited about checking out the liger next.

But then we came upon the sign, and it was EVEN BETTER THAN ZORSE

 They had a totally hilarious conversation about whether or not they could say ass when they told their friends in art and Lego class about this animal.

Look at Jack's smirk:

 Harry and Jack rode the carousel, but Dorothy didn't want to, and Cooper is too short to ride without me, so we had to watch,much to Cooper's disappointment.

 But then we all got to ride the train.

Today, I am spending the morning working on my online class at the library.  So, um, that's what I am going to do right now.

June: What I Read

June was a sublime summer reading month.  Looking back, last June was spectacular with Euphoria, The Invention of Wings, Guests on Earth, and The Book of Unknown Americans.  And the June before THAT, I read Flight Behavior, whose haunting ending still pops into my head.  June is just a good month for books, I guess.

10. The Honest Toddler by Bunmi Latidan:  Hilarious, but really no funnier than the blog.
9.  After Birth by Elisa Albert:  I LOVED this story of postpartum depression and female friendship.
8.  The First Bad Man by Miranda July:  What a weird, funny, and, in the end, totally charming book.  You should check it out but be prepared for weird sex.
7.  Crash and Burn By Lisa Gardner:  I have a special fondness for her thrillers because they kept me from going completely insane from my postpartum insomnia when Harry was a baby.  Also they are always suspenseful.
6.  Where They Found Her by Kimberly McCreight:  Not as good as Reconstructing Amelia or The Girl on the Train, but still, a fast, tense read.
5.  Early Warning by Jane Smiley:  So this is the second book in a series, but I didn't know that.  I tried to read the first one, but I just couldn't get into it.  This one was slow but ultimately really engaging, and I have the first one (Some Luck) waiting on my bookshelf.
4.  Dietland by Sarai Walker:  READ THIS!  It is funny, well plotted, full of excellent characters, feminist, and wonderfully hopeful.
3.  Being Mortal by Atul Gawande:  READ THIS, too!  It's about how medicine fails at the end of life and really, really made me thing about mortality, as the title suggests, but not in a depressing way (more like somber and contemplative).  Loved it.
2.  All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr:  I am about a year late on this, but seriously, read it.  It will stop centimeters short of breaking your heart, I think because it so well crafted that you can stand outside it a little and admire the poetry.
1.  In the Unlikely Event by Judy Blume:  I absolutely love Judy Blume.  The first book I remember completely losing myself in was Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret.  It was second grade, and my whole class went to music class, but I stayed in my seat because I was so wrapped up in my book I had no idea anyone had left the room.  I was really surprised to find myself alone with my teacher who said she didn't want t bother me.  Every fall, I think of Blubber because of the perfect way Blume described leaves and crisp air. I LOVE Judy Blume.  And this book was a total gift.  Her same voice, her same sharp child characters, only this time they get to grow all the way up.  I loved it.  Plus there were plane crashes.

All of these books were entertaining, but the top five were all contenders for book of the year.  Read them!  And then let's talk.

Pekin Weekend and More!

 Summer is making me a bad blogger AND an unhealthy eater.  Although, I think it's the liquor that's got me packing on the (5! Since May!) pounds.  So from now on, I am going to stop lying to My Fitness Pal (for real this time-- I ate an animal cracker that Dorothy fed me in bed this morning, and I counted those 11 calories, damnit.  No more handfuls of M&Ms from the Costco-sized bag, either).  Also, if I don;t have enough calories left to eat AND drink, I am just going to have a cocktail.  Responsible, no?

Speaking of eating, we did a quick picnic during Jack's baseball practice.  Note:  PB&J is not a good to-go food for my messiest little eater.

 Cooper seriously loves swings.  His pleas of "High mommy.  As high as the birds.  HIGHER!" huant my nightmares.

 As long as they were covered in peanut butter, we had ice cream, too.  I mean, why not.

 Of course, we have had many, many pool days.  Yesterday, in fact, Jack was super excited to be the first kid down the water slide after adult swim, and the lifeguard kept telling him to walk to the slide, but he just couldn't-- his sweet little seven-year-old anticipation made it too hard to walk, KWIM?

 We've had a little TV time, too, OF COURSE.

 Some hockey practice in pajamas.

 Ben and I went out for Mexican food and saw Ted 2 on Friday-- that movie is HILARIOUS.

 Also, I am SO ANNOYING wen I order a salad because I ask for everything on the side.  Makes you want to dine with me, huh? (I needed my calories for 2 Mezcal mules).

 We loaded up the van and went to my parents' house on Saturday.

 Dorothy was stoked because there was a park.

 All 3 boys on swings.  I have no clue who the lady in the white tank and black pants is, but she is in all of our park pics-- ha!

 Jack, apparently trying to break another wrist.

 She's really into this hug, obvs.

 MOAR ice cream.

 This was our pre-pizza snack, LOL.

 My parents had the trees cleared off a portion of their side yard, and it is suddenly awesome for flying kites.

 Dorothy helped herself to a quick (almost) half dozen donuts.

 We discovered a Portillo's in Rockford on our way home at exactly lunch time.  We were delighted!  But the place was a ZOO, so we had to get our food to go and eat on the steps of a neighboring bank, classy style.

 Look how big she is!!  If she didn;t nurse 3 times a day, I would be worried she's not a baby anymore.

 Beatrix was super happy to see her kids and vice versa when we picked her up from the boarder.

 Queen Elsa joined us at Costco.

 Cooper made some banana swirl after watching his favorite Daniel Tiger rerun.

 Ah, swim lessons.  Dorothy is only happy and content for about 45 seconds out of the whole half hour.  After that, it's a shit show.

But still even with swim lesson hijinks, extra five pounds, boys having fistfights all over my house, SUMMER IS MY FAVORITE.

Such a debauched summer

First of all, you need to go to Costco and buy this cucumber watermelon lemonade, pour it in a tall glass with ice-- fill the glass like 2/3 full and then fill it the rest of the way with your favorite vodka you've been storing in the freezer.  Grab a straw; throw in a lime.  SUMMER in a glass.

Oh my gosh you guys, we had the most ridiculous weekend.  We played in a surprisingly competitive and truly hilarious badminton tournament. We snapped these pictures of each other warming up with others, but we played as a team (DUH).

 Ben is a GREAT badminton player, which is how we battled our way to second place. I kind of suck because I have depth perception issues, but that's OK because Ben was EVERYWHERE all at once.  He was fab.  I was laughing SO HARD the whole time because people were getting so pissed when we beat them (in back-to-back games-- we only lost to the team who won) because I SUCKED.  The husbands all wised up pretty fast and started spiking the birdie at me, but Ben has giraffe arms, and he was ALWAYS RIGHT THERE.  Ridiculously fun.

We started drinking at 10:00 am and finished the championship match right at 7:45 pm.  We left the party (which kept going until midnight, but we could not hang) and took a taxi (the party was not in our neighborhood-- it's not that we're lazy) to the golf course restaurant where we ate huge plates of food-- first time in 5 years I have ordered fries instead of a steamed veggie-- stumbled home, and were asleep by 9:30.

 We got our car on Father's Day on our way to Family Float Day at the pool which would have been way more fun if we had 4 floats.  But we only had 3 floats and a beach ball.  So much fighting.

 Ben ditched us to go golfing with friends, and I went home to nap the babies and work on my crock pot ribs for a Fathers Day barbecue which descended into debauchery when all the grown ups played slosh ball and after getting on second base a couple times (where you have to chug a beer), I got mad drunk and flounced off the field to pout after everyone said I was out when I thought I was safe.  I'm the funnest.

 Dorothy, playing in her room:

 Harry and I went back to the same greasy spoon diner I blogged about last time because we love it so much.

 I accidentally packed him Cooper's trunks for swim lessons yesterday, but he was nice about it.

 Hijinks at the pool yesterday afternoon.

There is a lot I don't like about teaching online, but most of it is mitigated by days like today where it is 10:00, and I am still in bed.  WORKING from bed, really.