Monday, July 29, 2013

The crazy is BACK!

The other day at the grocery store, I got so angry at Ben about a bag of Goldfish crackers that I plucked the baby seat out of the car and started walking home by myself, answering the phone when Ben called me to inquire about my whereabouts to scream obscenities at him because he hadn't come to pick me up yet.  He didn't know where I was, and all I would tell him was that it was so obvious where I was, I wasn't going to say it out loud.  Meaning OF COURSE that I was walking home.  Last time I got so pissed off that I walked home from the grocery store, it was turkey and we were at Whole Foods, which is way farther away than the local store we found ourselves in on Sunday.  Since I have a history of stalking out of the store, I thought Ben would know I was on my way home and come pick me up.  But since I kept telling him it was obvious where I was, he assumed I was at Dunkin Donuts and waited in the parking lot for quite some time, fueling my rage.  If you haven't tried it, it is sort of liberating to walk down a busy street and shriek wildly into your cell phone at someone as cars zip by.

When I got back in the car, Jack said, "Did you have hormones when I was a baby too?"


But you know, the psychotic break at the grocery store, the nonstop exhaustion (the other day I didn't clean the house on house cleaning day but instead crawled under all my blankets fully dressed and took a 2 hour nap with the baby), the ever-present ache in my left shoulder, the weepiness at A Baby Story, the fact that I can't stop watching A Baby Story-- I didn't connect any of these things to the awful rush of postpartum hormones I always experience when the baby is around 4-5 months old until I noticed all the hair everywhere.  My hair!  It is falling out in clumps!  A sure sign that the good hormones are going away and the old cranky me is coming back.  I am so glad to know that I won't be this crazy forever.

I went straight to Whole Foods and got a dark chocolate/coconut candy bar and crammed the whole thing in my face calories be damned and then took another nap with Dorothy.  Nap time is a regular thing until I can calmly choose between cheese and whole grain Goldfish again.

Hey!  The other day! We went raspberry picking!  I have already Facebooked these pictures, but here they are anyway:

Now the healthy, low calorie raspberries have been turned into a delicious raspberry crisp. 

As long as I am feeling all crazy and hormonal, I thought it would be a perfect time to cut and color my hair-- bwhahahahahaha.  Look forward to that next week.

Also, I don't know if I am going to weigh myself this week because there is no way I can lay off the chocolate during P(erpetual)MS.  Ben can't wait for menopause-- it's going to be a hell of a ride.


  1. I sort of love losing my shit every once in awhile. I think it's good for the soul. My crazy came in the form of taking on every conceivable project and then wondering why I'm crying in my car on the way home from a 16 hour day. C asked if I was going to start doing drugs soon. Tempting...
    And the hair! It's freaking everywhere. And it comes out in clumps, which is so sexy.

  2. Anonymous12:46 AM

    I can't stop laughing at the mental image of cute as button Sarah stomping down the street, screaming obsenities into the phone, while hauling an adorable baby with some huge bow or blossom on her head.

  3. OMG, so been there. One time in college I was so pissed at Ryan I jumped out of the car at a stop sign and ran back to my dorm sobbing. People probably thought I was being kidnapped. And that was without postpartum hormones.

    I hope you are feeling better soon! Until then, chocolate and naps sounds like the way to go. Take care of yourself!

  4. My post partum hormones are always the very first month, and manifest mostly in weeping over every little thing. If I'm getting bitchy it's just regular hormones, although once I hauled off and hit Brett right in the face as hard as I could- three days later we found out I was pregnant with Isabelle. So he blames my hormones, but I know it was really just him being a total dick.