Thursday, February 08, 2007

Dear Handsome Baby in the Mirror,

I am writing to ask if you could please have a word with your toothy friend Harry, who really seems to look up to you. He seeks you out, Handsome Baby, in the men's section of Banana Republic-- you know, the big mirror by shoes-- in the mirror aisle of Target, even at the grocery store in the window's reflection, and I think he might listen to you.

The thing is, Harry is a biter, and now that he has 2 teeth, biting is starting to threaten his food supply. That's me, by the way.

Biting mommy while he eats is a GAME to him, Handsome Baby, and the only game that seems to be more fun (besides, of course, flinging toys and spoons off his high chair tray and staring pointedly at them until they are magically retreived) is the game mommy inadvertantly plays when she says ow or no.

Please tell Harry that biting ain't cool, okay, Handsome Baby. Maybe even ask him to imagine a world without real milk because seriously, those tiny teeth are sharp. He admires you, mirror image baby. Maybe you can talk some sense into him.

The Amazing (Almost) Nippeless Woman


  1. Yikes! Biting is the worst! He's looking so's the dissertation going? How does Harry like Home Depot? Kaleb thinks it's the hap-hap-happiest place on earth and with the best lighting scheme of anywhere!

  2. Doug says, "linebacker? Forget it. Two guard." He knows what that means... We love and miss y'all!

  3. Anonymous2:38 PM

    Can you please bring your daughter to my apartment tonight please so I can get her completely naked with me

  4. Anonymous6:24 PM

    And then I will be completely naked with her and then I will sit down on the toilet and then I will pick her up and put her naked body down on my naked body so she can feel my penis touching her butthole and then she will take a nap when she is sitting on my naked body because I will put her down and then I will tell her that I will be right back to help her get her clothes and underwear off and then I will show her what kind of candy I have for her and then I will put her down on her belly and then I will lay down on top of her body so my penis is on her butthole and then I will cum on her buttocks so she can feel it and then I will keep shooting my white stuff on her butt and then I will give her a bath with me and then I will pull her body close to my body so she can feel my skin right up against her skin

  5. Anonymous7:16 PM