Diving Updates!

 Cooper! Is at USA Diving junior nationals in Mission Viejo, CA this week. Here I am watching warm ups:

Yesterday, he had 3 meter prelims. To make it to semis, he needed to be 6th place or better. Going into the 9th and final round, he was in FIFTH PLACE! His final dive was a reverse 1.5, and he needed to get ok scores-- like 5's-- to clinch his semifinal spot. He got... 3.5's. He just BIFFED IT you guys. It was a sunny day, and he was diving outside, and he thought the sky was the water so he came out of his tuck when he saw the "water" but then when he figured out it was the sky he had to maneuver like crazy to save the dive-- thank god he didn't get hurt.

The girls and I were watching at home, and Harry was watching at work. He screamed NOOOOOOOO when it happened and freaked some people out. My YouTube was a little slow, so I got Ben's "Ooooooof" text seconds before the dive happened and was at least. a little prepared.

It happens at 1:46-- you can totally see him realize he's in trouble mid air.

Coop's in great spirits, though, because he is only 13 competing his first year in 14/15 boys, and he did not expect to have a competitive list or compete with the best kids, and there he was! Hanging right in there! He does a front, inward, and back 2.5 (instead of 1.5), and now he is really motivated to get a reverse 2.5 as well-- a real big boy list for sure.

He has 1-meter prelims today at 11:55 am CA time, and you can watch on the USA Diving YouTube if you want to. He is group B boys (there are 2 events happening at once with 2 different live streams of the same pool-- it is slightly confusing).

Back at home, Dorothy competed in the All-City dive meet on Monday and was fab. She did not make the final round, but she dove really well and had fun with pool and school friends.

It was 11,000 degrees in the shade, but Minnie was a trooper

Last night was Jack's turn to shine at All-City, and boy did he! He got 9th in 15-19 boys and was awesome. He even banged his Apple watch on the diving board railing during in approach for his double pike and ended up leaving the board on two feet and still made the dive-- that's YEARS of diving experience right there.

He also got a brand new dive for finals-- a back 1.5 straight. It looks so cool the announcer actually SAID that was cool while he was under water:

There's an elementary school across the street from the host pool thank goodness, so Minnie had fun while the top 16 warmed up their finals dives, even though it was still 95 degrees and humid. Slight disaster when the snow cone truck was already gone when we got there-- averted by a trip to DQ on the way home-- phew!

After the meet, the kids all threw ridiculous stuff while the hosts got awards ready. I was too busy screaming belly flop to film Jack-- it was epic. 

Next year is Jack's LAST All-City meet if you can even believe that. And! OUR POOL IS HOSTING!! I can't wait (I even signed up to be on the host committee)-- how cool to have your SENIOR RECOGNITION for your favorite sport AT YOUR OWN POOOOOL!!!

Sorry about the weight loss triggers, everyone.

 I got a comment on Monday's post that really made me think:

"I have loved reading your blog for years but I feel like so much of your “health” writing reads as fat phobia. Obviously everyone gets to do what they want to do, but many nutritionists argue that intermittent fasting is just a way to justify/repackage disordered eating. I definitely wish you the best and know that all stages of menopause are god awful, but I hope you (and your family) know that you are worth far more than numbers on a scale or calorie counts. Thanks for the insight into your life over the years… I will sincerely miss reading but feel like it is more harmful than fun these days."

I am so sad that someone has decided not to come back to my blog because I am writing about weight loss-- but also I GET IT. I thought these same things as I wrote the weight loss posts-- diet culture, fat phobia, triggering people by talking about weight loss, all of it!

But! Is losing weight inherently fat phobic? How can I better talk about weight loss in a way that is not fat phobic? Is it ok for me to want to be thinner when I understand  the broader context of a diet culture that privileges thin bodies, how fundamentally fucked up it is that patriarchy demands women take up less space, etc?

My blood pressure is starting to go up, and my cholesterol is getting really high (this is a thing that happens in menopause? AS IF MENOPAUSE IS NOT ALREADY THE GD WORST). You guys know my dad died  at 71 from surgery to repair an aortic aneurysm. I am getting worried about my health and longevity at the same time I am gaining weight-- and visceral belly fat-- and seeing  those higher blood pressure and cholesterol numbers for the first time in my life. 

From my perspective, losing weight is healthy for me. At the same time, I understand that thinner does not mean healthier in all contexts. And! Weight loss is not my only (or even most important) goal. My goals are to lower my cholesterol and blood pressure, build muscle as I head into menopause, and maintain bone health (all my dorky wearable weights--thinking of wrist weights too...). Doing those things, though, is also resulting in weight loss. (Which I enjoy because I am a product of a fat phobic diet culture.)

Anyway-- I am sorry I sound fat phobic when writing about weight loss and health habits. 

And! I have also read about IF and eating disorders-- but I have also read about the benefits of IF, specifically for menopausal women... so I am giving it a shot. 

Harvard Health Watch July 2024

(And I mean searched my library's journal database for articles, not listened to a few internet nutrition coaches tell me what they think-- because social media health proselytizing is not for me. And! I see this on both sides of the coin-- really fit people who act like macros are morality AND ALSO popular internet advice about the evils of ANY KIND of nutrition and exercise plan) 

Because I am tracking macros, not calories, I am NOT starving myself eating from 10-6, and I've cut out my nighttime TV eating (and do not miss it). This doesn't mean I would cancel plans that fell outside my IF timeline-- I am not rigid about this in a weird way-- which is one of the warning signs that IF is leading to disordered eating. Eating in an 8-hour window DOES make it easier to eat less, and for an abstainer like me, eating after 6pm isn't even tempting any more.

It is easier for me to abstain than to moderate in all areas of my life, so I am worried about long term maintenance of health habits. Obviously, I will not abstain from added sugar forever. We are eating cake at least twice in August (probably more like 4 times given how many celebrations Minnie is planning for the big 0-5), and I adore baking. It will be a struggle, I think, to add in sweets without centering them in my diet again because it is really hard for me to just have a little or just have one-- even when I eat it mindfully and enjoy the experience.

For a long time, I was telling myself that I was "practicing intuitive eating" but I was really just eating whatever whenever under that guise-- which is not healthy for me in terms of cholesterol, blood pressure, sodium intake-- no matter how accepting of my physical body I tried to be. (not very-- I am a product of diet culture).

Anyway, this whole thing falls under the doth protest too much umbrella,I guess. Sorry for the triggers on my Monday posts, everyone.

Health Streak Update: Week 3

 I found THESE peanut butter cups at Costco, and I am a YUGE fan.

I got some bleach on my pink hotty hots, so I ordered a new pair in the same size, and they're TOO BIG! (I am keeping them because they were final sale because I bought the clearance color, even though I could return them for store credit, but honestly $50 is all I want to spend on work out shorts anyway, so I would probably not exchange them since the non-clearance color is $70, and they're not that big).

(Also, next time I will get the 2.5 inch inseam, not the 4).

(Also also do you love dorky, dorky ankle weights?)

I am still down 14 pounds **whomp whomp** no more weight loss this week, so I am going to look even harder at nutrition next week. I have started putting chocolate milk in my coffee again-- which is probably knocking out the intermittent fasting benefits. I also am going to try apple cider vinegar gummies and a packet of Zena super greens (bought at Costco; nobody else likes them) along with my fiber supplement, B6, and fish oil. Maybe this will help me feel fuller longer and not eat all of the things for breakfast. 

If you are someone who wants more servings of fruit and veggies and also wants to remember to drink more water, these little super greens packets might be good for you. I eat enough fruits and veggies without them, but they can't HURT, and because I am not eating added sugar, they taste unbelievably sweet and delicious to me (SO SAD YOU GUYS. I look forward to those apple cider gummies like they are ACTUAL CANDY.)

Still walking all over the hood with Annabel in my dorky weighted glory and still doing a strength workout every day and also cardio. I like this routine and may keep it going forever. I used to take weekends off, but that adds up to ... a lot of time off.

Long term plans: I think I am ready to join a gym so I can lift larger weights, get a personalized strength plan from a trainer, and have access to group fitness classes. Ben and I are going to look at some when he gets home from California because he is also interested in those benefits, and we would like Cooper to lift with a trainer. I am also going to find a place to take a couple of barre and yoga classes a week now that Minnie will be in kindergarten, and I will have time to do things for myself. A NEW ERA.

I just cooked a bunch of lentils and also sauteed diced sweet potatoes and chopped kale in olive oil, garlic, pepper, and curry powder. I think I will eat all of these things together with black beans and some sort of spicy greek yogurt sauce as burritos until I get sick of them, and think I am going to make some (modified to make it lower calorie) copycat Whole Foods chicken salad to eat for the rest of the week.

For me, the key to meeting health goals is to make sure I have high protein and fiber food options prepped and ready to go. I adore Oikos triple zero yogurt when I am looking for something treaty. I cannot get enough almond butter and cosmic crisp apples, and I am now someone who looks forward to a few dried apricots and handful of pecans. WHO EVEN AM I YOU GUYS?

 

5 on a Friday: Notes from a 7-hour pool day

 1. Yes, the title of this post is accurate. Cooper's club diving practice got canceled (this last week before the team leaves for nationals has been a real shit show), and Dorothy was at dance ALL DAY, so Cooper, Minnie, and I went to the pool at 2 pm and stayed until close at 9. Well, I took a break to grab Minnie a change of suit (chafing), and she and I grabbed Dorothy at 7pm and brought her back for the final 2 hours-- but still 2pm-9pm AT THE POOOOL.

2. I read So Far Gone and liked it well enough. I think I really wanted Richard Russo to be writing it, though (especially the buddy dialogue), and there was a really odd mix of granular action and then sweeping exposition. 

3. Coop's national team joined us for a couple hours, and the kids ran all of their dives over and over again and played smallest splash with a running score. They asked whatever lifeguard was in the deep end to judge the splash, and a large group of little kids congregated to scream out scores. It was darling.

4. I did no house work, though, and didn't even fold the day's laundry, super unfortch because I changed Jack and Coop's sheets, blankets, and duvet covers. (I mean, no  housework is not accurate because I did clean all the bathrooms and make sure all the bedrooms were tidy-- something I do first thing every morning-- and I swept the kitchen floor and prepped the coffee, etc, after we got home).

5. Minnie is totally self sufficient in the deep end, and I never have to go in the pool ever again-- UNLESS I WANT TO.

I was worried about needing to wash my hair because of all the sunscreen and sweat, but this $10 scarf might have saved the day!

Coop and friends did this for literal HOURS

Suit change!

Exhausted

Fave shot of the day 

Catch up (not that there's anything exciting going on)

 All right! I have a new estrogen patch and I CAN also have more progesterone, but I asked if it would be OK to stay on my current dose since I am sort of worried that it's progesterone that keeps me awake.(I know it is not supposed to, but I also got insomnia when I took the progesterone only birth control pill, so I worry) Hopefully this sleep blip resolves soon (I am sort of sleeping, but yuck).

This week is challenging this foggy old brain of mine because Harry went to Eau Claire (he interns for a city council member and needed to go to a city council meeting and also see some friends) and Cooper's dive team had facility issues and had to go to Milwaukee to practice one day and then practice at a weird time Wed-Fri. Monday was the same as it has been which also threw me for a loop honestly. TL;DR DIFFERENT IS BAD.

Coop broke another pool diving record, this one held by another kid. So now the record board will say

Boys 10U Cooper Jedd

Boys 11-12 Cooper Jedd

Boys 13-14 Cooper Jedd

He's coming for that 15-18 record in a couple years...

(also that's a monster score for 6 dives, which is how many the summer league competes)

Minnie did another darling dance camp:

And I had really tight work deadline that popped up, so I was SO grateful for the 3 hours of childcare.

Minnie has had a great time exploring other pools in town while her sons compete at dive meets

And spending afternoons at our pool while I grade in the shade

Dorothy has a few weeks of dance try outs left, and she is starting to add private lessons after classes, which means more pick up changes to remember and lots of swim--dive--dance mornings for her.

I have been leaving the house in exercise clothes quite a bit. Regrettable but that's where I am right now.

Health streak update week 2

I am doing... okay on my nutrition goals. 

I did drink a glass of wine at bar trivia this week (we were 4th place going into the final, had the right answer, changed our minds, and lost it all), so my no sugar goal was a bit lofty. 

I have been aiming for 100-ish grams of protein and 30 grams of fiber, but a couple of days last week, I struggled to eat 60 grams of protein.

 One night we got home super late from a dive meet and had been planning to go out on the way home (I was looking forward to a salad with salmon) but every place was packed and we were SO CRABBY and I just ate a bowl of Cheerios and called it a night. 

The other night, I just did not want chicken, but it was my only on-hand protein, so I just ate a peanut butter sandwich. 

I have also gotten sick of my green smoothie, which was a great way to start with TONS of protein, between Fairlife milk, Greek yogurt, and plant-based protein powder. I need to add this back in a few mornings a week and come up with more exciting pre-prepped options for lunch and dinner. I have pretty much just been eating chicken or fish, steamed broccoli, and quinoa on repeat. Boring, huh?

One night Ben made Blackstone fajitas (shrimp and steak), and they were AWESOME.

I made cookies for the kids and had ZERO, which was pretty huge for me. I didn't even really want them. I have a chunk of an HU dark chocolate bar at night, and that really checks my sugar box. I think it also helps that cherries are so incredible right now.

For me, counting macros has been an excellent way to take emotion out of eating. I need to eat x amount of protein and x amount of fiber every day, and I use food choices to get me there as efficiently and deliciously as possible. It's pretty great.

So far, I am down 14 pounds.

Coop could not even wait for a croissant, and this cracked me up because I am soooooo that guy as well. I ate an apple while driving home from this trip (washed with a water bottle and a baby wipe LOL)

I hit all my exercise marks, even when it rained and dog walks were a pain.

I found a new favorite 10-minute work out that I will be adding into my rotation. 

And I look SO COOL in my ankle weights

Now here's the shitty part:

OUT OF NOWHERE my INSOMNIA CAME BACK. I messaged the OB's office-- maybe I need more hormones?? Anxiety and hot flashes are making a return as well, after several truly blissful weeks. WHYYYYYYY MEEEEEEE?

(Not just insomnia-- even a night sweat situation when we accidentally set the thermostat to 62 degrees and slept with our fan on and just truly shitty shitty shitty moods, thinking I am dying of an incurable disease every second-- all of the bad things. I think I took an extra progesterone because I thought I missed one but maybe did not (ADD BRAIN FOG TO THE LIST), so maybe I just screwed up my balance for a few days?)

BONUS: I dyed my hair at home because I could not even wait another second.

Before:

After:

I am going to be careful about washing it (which sucks for me because I really like to wash my hair every night in the shower. I got shower caps and THIS dry shampoo and THIS shampoo and THIS conditioner for when I do have to wash.), and I am going to use Madison Reed toner as needed.

But I feel like it looks totally fine. I do not want to go light, and last time I got my hair dyed in the salon, it was super super super dark and my hair got really thin. But! Whatever! Onward and upward! I am still getting a good cut next month and will continue to grow it out a bit.

But for realz-- how do you keep your hair not gross between washes? I knind of hate this a lot, but I'm willing to give it a try...

5 on a Friday: looking ahead to the fun part of fall scheduling

 1. Illness, mine: 

Ugh I was sick this week, and I kept testing negative for Covid, so Ben went to work like normal, and I had to do everything while feeling like trash, and my resentment levels know no bounds-- EVEN THOUGH there are good reasons for how we spent our time. Blergh. Being a grown up sucks. I did have time Sunday and Monday to lie around and watch And Just Like That season 3 (the eps that are out so far, that is), and even though I have been following along with the hilarious Vogue reviews, I love this show fiercely and I don't care that it sucks. Seema in an LV eye patch is my favorite.

2. Almost checking my list: 

I know that July is packed, and I am doing my best to get everyone where they need to be and hit my goals every day. BUIT ALSO it is really hard for me to do everything in my routine, and one thing (a different thing each day!) has been falling by the wayside lately. My hair. Make up. My strength work out (I do it later). Getting dressed. You get the idea. Luckily, I gave my workout wear a small glow up (2 bras that have pads and give me 2 distinct boobs, 2 cute boxy cropped T's, 2 boxy tanks, 2 fluttery shorts to go with the 2 Lululemon pairs I already had) So now if I have to wear exercise clothes to swim lessons and to drop off kids (not my goal, but the days are BUSY), I look... not tragic (unless you ask Dorothy).

3. REALLY checking my other lists:

I am just checking things off my list left and right. Our district dropped its school supply lists (even though we do not start school until SEPTEMBER **praise hands**), and Minnie I bought her list (including all the teacher wish list items and communal snack) IMMEDIATELY. I am hoping her Land's End backpack we bought 2 years ago when she started 3K makes it all the way through elementary school, and I am sending in her current sneakers for gym and buying new shoes closer to the start of school. SO CHECK THAT OFF. I even ordered name stickers for her headphones and water bottles and bento box (also still good from nursery school).

After suffering much senior picture sticker shock (people charge ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS OR MORE) for sessions around here (the mom blog friend who did Harry's is not doing pics at all right now), we decided to combine Jack's pictures with our annual family photoshoot (he is so cool with that) and are working on nailing down a date and a location (must be after my hair appointment because things are escalating quickly). 

Also-- WHY WOULD SENIOR PICS BE SO EXPENSIVE? And what kid wants an elaborate phot essay to document their last year of high school? I do not get it. They need a good shot for the yearbook and maybe one or two more for an grad announcement and possibly more for a social media post and ... what am I missing????

Minnie's bday gifts are all ordered, and we have booked our (reluctant) WI Dells waterpark stay (she wanted a waterpark family overnight in lieu of a kid party-- you only turn 5 once, I guess). (She is actually starting to clamor for the AG doll of the year, and I will probably cave because I cannot resist those darn dolls) (and neither can she).

4. Routine feeling very routine

I am picking up kids, dropping kids off, making lunches and sibling spectator dinners, washing one thousand pool towels a day, etc. This was our last super super busy week because next week, the club dive schedule changes a bit and then the following week is dive nats for Coop and all-city for Jack and Dorothy, meaning we will be down to DANCE ONLY for the first 2 weeks of August and then NOTHING AT ALL for a week-- and then I have eleventy billion meetings, and the school year will be upon us.

6:45 am swim team drop

Perfect ballet bun **pats self on back** for 6 hours of dance after she already swam for 75 minutes and dove for 90

CUTEST swim lessons. She's in the big kid part of the pool working on stroke development, and it is DARLING.

5. Dreaming of fall planning

I am getting ready to assemble my first ever PLANNER STACK! For me, September is the real January, so it makes sense to start my planning with the new school year. My anchor will still be my google calendar (where I keep track of everyone's everything), but I need the act of writing my life down to help me remember ehat's going on and stay on top of everything. I have tried to do this on my phone via Notes, but it isn;t the same for me. I need a notebook-- and WHY LIMIT MYSELF TO JUST ONE??

I am going to get a daily planner by the same company I currently love (Ohh Deer) because it is just a teeny bit structured but not so much that I rebel, and I love the thickness and size. I like, too, that it lasted me just 8-ish months-- this seems perfect for the school year, and it will be fun to buy a summer-only planner next year to really mark that season for me-- especially since I often struggle with staying on track in the summer or even defining what that means. Also I carry it everywhere and it it gets beat up-- no pressure to keep for the whole year and a very small price tag.

I am also going to get a new large monthly planner because mine is way too messy for me to love it anymore, but I am newly addicted to color coding my month so I can see at a glance how much work time I will have, how much of that time is for deep thinking work as opposed to keep-my-head-above-water work, how many solo parenting days I will face, where we can find time to go out as a couple, etc. 

I am going to add a weekly planner to my stack because I really do feel fresh start energy every Monday, and I'd like to add a weekly reflection to that morning's routine so I can make sure I don't miss the big stuff that will structure my week. We are also entering into the season of everyone's check ups and dental appointments, and those can really throw me off if I am not on top of them. 

I would also like a concept planner or some other kind of notebook for thinking about creative projects and projects with longer deadlines. Right now, I am not systematic in where I keep track of these things and their accompanying ideas (sometimes google docs-- sometimes my current planner in the notes section, but it's hard to find those notes when I need them-- sometimes on post its or the back of receipts)

Stuck in the kitchen!

 Something happened to me the other day that used to happen to me all the time and drives me up a wall: I got stuck in the kitchen after lunch and didn't leave it until 8pm. Does this ever happen to you? You are cleaning up lunch and then maybe you empty the dishwasher and then as you are finishing that up, someone makes a snack and then you bake something and then all the sudden it is food prep time and then actual meal time and then clean up and then you prep for the next day (a lunch for someone going to a dance camp  for example) and make coffee and set the coffee pot(s) to brew and then it's time for someone's bedtime snack and OH MY GOD.

Ben, all footloose and fancy free taking one million meetings and then puttering around walking the dog a couple of times and folding some laundry after work hours was like why are you so crabby and I snapped I HAVE BEEN STUCK IN THE KITCHEN FOR 6 AND A HALF HOURS, but I actually think it was longer

Never wear an apron with long strings when you have a puppy.

Making muffins, but she looks like she's churning butter.

SUCH A MESS THO

Gah!

OMG, Annabel.

Then, since everything was trashed, I let Minnie play potions, and Dorothy and Coop joined in unexpectedly.

STCUK IN THE KITCHEN.

Coop makes snackle boxes for Squid Games and Big Brother (parents of the year over here)

Oh. And. After my smug Friday post, Jack woke up with a fever and is positive for covid. Whomp whomp.

** at the time of this post going live, he is covid negative but has a raging wisdom tooth surgery infection and is on much amoxicillin.

I only ordered only a few dance pics (25 bucks a pop for a freaking social media-sized download), but they are good ones: