Friday, March 17, 2023

Dance Mom Practice

 Oh, that?

That’s Dorothy’s dance bag (that is actually just a duffel bag we already had because I am not ready to shell out for one of these because OMG that’s pricey) packed with her stuff and plus also stuff to entertain Minnie for hours on end because last Sunday? Was Dorothy’s studio’s team dress rehearsal. It’s a 10-hour event where every single competition routine performs full out at a local high school. Packed dressing rooms! Quick costume changes! Cool lights! Notes from a panel of teachers! It’s intense. AND NOT TODDLER FRIENDLY. WHO KNEW? (Me. I knew. But I had no choice. Coop had a dive meet, and, as we have discussed, Minnie is NOT a silent audience member. Luckily, she could be as loud as she wanted to be at dance because the music was always already louder.)

I spent a LOT of time following her up and down these stairs.

The team is encouraged to stay all day and watch all the dances, but I am a reluctant joiner and honestly would have bailed early EXCEPT Dorothy had the first dance of the morning, the dance right before lunch, and the penultimate dance of the day.

Speaking of lunch! Minnie ate hers before 11 am.
How cute is this? Dorothy is the teeny blond with her hands on her hips.
After Minnie ate and we did her hair along with Dorothy’s and she played in the bathroom slamming stall doors as hard as she could and dodging them when they popped open in her face, she was supper bored and wanted to go home and watch tv.
Luckily, Coop made quick work of his 1 meter competition, placing third in the junior Olympic level, and they sped home from Milwaukee to pick up Minnie. Curbside, even. (He won 3 meter at the novice level on Saturday).
JUST IN TIME for Dorothy to dress like Tony Soprano and do another dance through her seething red cloud of hanger.

After lunch, with a 3-hour break for Dorothy and no Minnie, was the best part of my day. Dorothy perched on the end of the stage with her friends and watched the older girls dance, and I sat in the audience reading and occasionally getting sucked into a dance.

We had plenty of time to do her hair and makeup for her last number (musical theater and darling)

I did not take any pictures of musical theater because Dorothy’s hand started bleeding, and it took me WAY TOO LONG to realize that I should go help her. The studio owner took her to the bathroom, and I caught up with them, but I had no supplies because I was wearing a fanny pack (it was international fanny pack day) (I wore it cross-body), and that’s what I said when I got to the bathroom. Dorothy and her teacher both looked at me like what the what, which, honestly is what I deserve. “Sorry it took me so long. It’s international fanny pack day.” WHAT.

Cute costume, though:

So. She has a competition this weekend. And I have to drive home in the dark. I am a huge wimpy baby about driving at night and about driving far away from my town. Wish us luck!


  1. That's a terrifying long day outside the home. This is where I would have been the worst mom and looking for excuses to bail... Good on you for doing such an amazing job with your ten-and-two-year-olds, Sarah! And sending good energies for the weekend and unfamiliar drives.

    1. I was CRAVING my house and just wanted to tidy something and have a snack.

  2. I love everything about this. There's a part of me that really loves the long days and intense waits, and another part of me that is SO grateful that Eli's meets require very little of me other than to track his movements and buy snacks. Also, can we all appreciate that you entertained Minnie for that whole thing with very little mention of ipads? Because that's how my girls survive day-long commitments and I always feel like I'm phoning it in (literally, sometimes)

    1. I didn't even bring her a screen. Who even AM I?

  3. I've also decided to preface any awkward situation with "It's International Fanny Pack Day" Who's going to fact check something like that?

  4. THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY DOLLARS? I would say something like 'it should get up and dance the polka all by itself for that much' if I didn't feel like it would make me sound seventy-five years old. Oh well. "It's international fanny pack day" lololol. Opening up a six-pack of whoop-ass on some bathroom doors is a vastly underrated method of self-entertainment, if you ask me.

  5. Wait, I had to come back because it actually has the unmitigated gall to admit that it's 230 dollars for a SMALL pink monochrome leopard dream duffel, wtf wtf wtf

    1. OMG we went to an actual competition this weekend, and they were EVERYWHERE omg.