Healthy* habits I plan to keep in August

1. Exercising 7 days a week. I LOVE IT. Annabel and I are so happy when I make sure we get an hour of walking in, and I adore seeing myself get stronger doing strength workouts. I have muscle definition in my thighs (front and sides!), and I can see muscles in my arms for the first time in a looooong time. I love it.

2. Avoiding added sugar for the most part. I FEEL SO GOOD YOU GUUUUUYS. YES I still put Fairlife chocolate milk in my coffee. YES I eat mini Cliff bars and mini Larabars, which both have a bit of sugar. YES I am eating dark chocolate after dinner, but otherwise? No sweets for me, and the longer I go without them, the less I want to eat them. Minnie and I made banana chocolate chip bread, and I didn't even think about eating stray chocolate chips from the counter or tasting the bread as it cooled. It wasn't that I wanted those things but didn't want to eat them, I just... wasn't interested. 

3. Balancing meals and snacks:  During the banana bread making, I was also full from the rosemary ham (Trader Joe's), brie, mustard, and arugula sandwich (with 2 plums!) I had for lunch and the string cheese, pecans, and apple I ate for an afternoon snack. I am making sure to have protein and fiber at every meal and snack, and I am not walking away from any meals and snacks feeling hungry or unsatisfied. If I feel hungry, I eat more food. It's great.

4. Eating an anti inflammatory diet. I eat most of these things (except avocado because I am allergic) every day, and I feel SO GOOD. I am sleeping well (THANK GOODNESS). (Most days-- I had a crappy night recently and am going to talk about it with my OB next week). My mood is great. I don't experience energy spikes and crashes. My wedding rings fit again, and I can wear them every day. I also think the red skin around my mouth and nose has gone away, but that might be my tan.

5. Wearing my dorky vest and ankle weights. I feel very strong and capable. Also dorky. Did I mention that?

5. Making sure my exercise clothes are at least semi-presentable. I feel better when I look better, so I will make sure to buy a few pairs of not-ugly joggers and sweats as the weather gets cooler. I used to work out in rags and then if I had to go somewhere before I got a chance to exercise, I would skip the work out or I'd get up crazy early to fit it all in, and, it turns out, I just needed better clothes. Now I can run an errand, take a kid somewhere, etc before OR after exercise-- game changer. I felt VERY validated when I heard Kendra Adachi talk about the magic of starting her day in a sports bra on The Lazy Genius podcast because I stumbled upon this hack on my own, and it has really been genius.

6. Thinking about macros: For me, this is a totally emotion-free lens through which to view food. I want to eat around 100 grams of protein a day and around 30 grams of fiber and have about a 40/30/30 split for protein, carbs, and fat. I also want to keep sodium under 2000 mg. It is fun to plan meals (for everyone!) with these guidelines in mind. Last night, for example, the kids and I had steamed broccoli and snap peas, roasted sweet potatoes (with olive oil), and chicken breasts, and they also had french bread and butter. It was easy, quick, and delicious. For dessert they had ice cream and wafer cookies, and I put almond butter on half an HU salty dark chocolate bar (it is common for us to have dessert every night and for people to choose their own from a variety of sweet options). 

7. Prepping meals: A bigger goal of mine is to do a better job of batch prepping meal components a few times a week. I have done this to an extent lately (making enough sweet potatoes for a few days; cooking a bunch of beans and quinoa at once), but I could be more strategic about it, and I would LOVE to remember to make steel cut oats ahead of time. It would also help me to have a bunch of protein options ready to go. I do this with chicken, lentils, and black beans pretty well-- but what else do I want to eat? Chick peas? Cottage cheese? Turkey? What do you eat for protein that's not red meat? (I am eating fish a few times a week, but, for me, that's not a make ahead food). Minnie and I went to TJs the other day, and I remembered all of their pre-cubed starchy veggies and fresh veggie noodle options-- I will be back for these!

(She gave me one of her stickers)

8. Swallowing those supps. I am taking fish oil and fiber and apple cider vinegar gummies and B6 in the morning and magnesium at night, plus melatonin as needed. I also eat my trusty Costco super greens sometimes (caffeine in them, so if I don't remember them before 10, I skip them).

*Healthy: Was my use of this word disingenuous in this post and in previous posts? Should I have said diet or weight loss instead? I don't think so, actually. I want to be healthier AND ALSO I want to lose weight. I have lost 15 pounds and I would really like to lose 15 more. And weight loss CAN be healthy-- and you can lose weight in a way that is good for your body, happens WHILE you are building muscle, and is also good for your mental health. Weight loss and good mental health are not diametrically opposed, and if I am planning the number of times I might indulge on sweets in an especially celebratory month? I actually think that's OK, you guys. If I skip the bread and butter at dinner because I would rather eat other things that deliver carbs and fat in a way that better supports my cholesterol and sugar management, my macros, and my weight loss goal? That's OK, too. Being mindful about what I consume is not automatically disordered. Yes, I like the way I look better when I am thinner (thanks, diet culture-- none of us grew up in a vacuum), but I also really really like the way I feel when I am stronger and on a more even keel thanks to more regular exercise and a really nutritious diet. So. For me right now in the way that I am doing it, weight loss is part of my healthy habits.

NME: August, I love you

 New! Month! ENERGYYYYYY!

August goals:

1. Get ready for back-to-school (Mentally. Plus buy shoes for all and first day outfits for anyone who wants one)

2. Help Jack apply to college (GULP)

3. Fix my blender or buy a new one

4. Book spa services at Sundara and finally use my bday gift card

5. Catch up on my Book of the Month books and read all my darn library books

So much to love about August:

• School prep (the best part of the yeeaar)
• Minnie's bday
• Our wedding anniversary (TWENTY YEARS )
• Annabel's bday
• Summer's last gasp

We have a really easy August calendar:

• Dance is over after 8/14.
• The girls and I are all getting hair cuts. 
• I have a follow-up OB appointment and acupuncture. 
• Middle school has announced the dates of open house, and we are waiting on Minnie's kindergarten conference date. (Jack is taking care of HS registration on his own) 

College applications opened 8/1!

• Jack and I have a date to apply next weekend
• He has already asked teachers to write letters and has told them he's going to apply crazy early
• He figured out how to secure his unofficial transcript and knows who to ask about his official ones (his counselor retired at the end of the school year, so there might be a lag here
• He's working on essay drafts right now
• Like Harry, he will start his senior year with college apps done and dusted. I LOVE THIS!!! (He is applying to Bradley, UW-Eau Claire, UW- Lacrosse, and UW-Milwaukee). (UW-MKE is a direct admit school, but I have no idea if he checked the box to be directly admitted... I probably should have followed up on this with him, but he is more interested in the selective admission school, so I ... didn't).

I KEEP buying lunch boxes and food from school lunch displays because I AM A LITTLE BIT EXCITED ABOUT SENDING THE KIDS TO SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOL. 

Ben is absolutely making fun of my lunch box purchasing-- it might be getting weird. 

(I have bought two $3 insulated lunch sacks from Target-- probably for me-- a Loveshack Fancy knockoff for Dorothy (she DESTROYED her $40 Hydroflask lunch box last year, so no more expensive ones for her), 4 of the $2.99 insulated bento covers from the Target dollar spot (they fit Bentgo bentos and Planet Box Rovers, and they can be used as lunch boxes w/o bentos), and I bought Minnie a back up Cat and Jack bento so she can have 2 boxes in rotation (love Bentgo bentos, but Cat and Jack's are TEN DOLLARS, so I had to try) I have also stocked up on sandwich cutters in fun shapes and adorable ice packs. Plus a cute pouch for snacks for our after school runs and those viral Target pencil cases which are PERFECT for stashing snacks that should not get crushed in backpacks and activity bags.)

 I AM READY to send the children out the door is what I am saying.

How can this little dolly be off to KINDERGARTEN????

July: What I Read

 Looking back on my July reading, I am not wild about any of. WOW. With that opening line, this blog post is sure to be a smash. **Eye roll**

Reading view most of the month

Meh

The Hawthorne Legacy by Jennifer Lynn Barnes: I am kind of into this YA thriller series **Audio

Everything Sweet Is Bitter by Samantha Crewson: This has good reviews and generated a lot of pre-pub buzz, but I did not love any of the characters, and the story was kind of boring/ trope heavy. **Audio **2025

Veronica Ruiz Breaks the Bank by Elle Cosimano: Cute. *Audio

Mark Twain by Ron Chernow: Ugh I WANTED to like this because I think Twain is fascinating, but it was SUCH a slog. And! Chernow was extremely preoccupied with the Clemmons family as enslavers in the south and he wanted to, like, repudiate Twain in a weird way. But then! He would say something that totally erased race and class-- like Tom Sawyer was the picture of American boyhood-- and it was just so WEIRD. Also! Twain had a thing for young girls.

The Accidental Favorite  by Fran Littlewood: Ok. The premise is good (read the cover flap), but it didn't bowl me over. **2025

Great but old

Rules of Civility by Amor Towles: LOVED IT SO MUCH. *Audio

Best of the month, which is a lower bar than usual, I think

The Maid's Secret by Nita Prose: This series is growing on me. *2025

The Briar Club by Kate Quinn: Audio book is **chef's kiss** *audio  **2025

Famous Last Words by Gillian McAllister: Good, but I was expecting better from this author. **2025

You Don't Belong Here by Megan Miranda: A serviceable thriller **2025

Next to Heaven by James Frey: Trashy and delightful and quirkily written-- big fan. THIS review sums up the Fey controversy nicely. **2025

El Dorado Drive by Megan Abbott: Ditto (also some good characters) **2025

So Far Gone by Jess Walter: I liked this, but I was expecting to be blown away. **2025

STATS

BTM 13

Book books: 7

Kindle books 0

Audio books 6

2025 books: 10

BTY 112

Book books: 63

Kindle books: 3

Audio books: 46

2025 books: 64

Diving Updates!

 Cooper! Is at USA Diving junior nationals in Mission Viejo, CA this week. Here I am watching warm ups:

Yesterday, he had 3 meter prelims. To make it to semis, he needed to be 6th place or better. Going into the 9th and final round, he was in FIFTH PLACE! His final dive was a reverse 1.5, and he needed to get ok scores-- like 5's-- to clinch his semifinal spot. He got... 3.5's. He just BIFFED IT you guys. It was a sunny day, and he was diving outside, and he thought the sky was the water so he came out of his tuck when he saw the "water" but then when he figured out it was the sky he had to maneuver like crazy to save the dive-- thank god he didn't get hurt.

The girls and I were watching at home, and Harry was watching at work. He screamed NOOOOOOOO when it happened and freaked some people out. My YouTube was a little slow, so I got Ben's "Ooooooof" text seconds before the dive happened and was at least. a little prepared.

It happens at 1:46-- you can totally see him realize he's in trouble mid air.

Coop's in great spirits, though, because he is only 13 competing his first year in 14/15 boys, and he did not expect to have a competitive list or compete with the best kids, and there he was! Hanging right in there! He does a front, inward, and back 2.5 (instead of 1.5), and now he is really motivated to get a reverse 2.5 as well-- a real big boy list for sure.

He has 1-meter prelims today at 11:55 am CA time, and you can watch on the USA Diving YouTube if you want to. He is group B boys (there are 2 events happening at once with 2 different live streams of the same pool-- it is slightly confusing).

Back at home, Dorothy competed in the All-City dive meet on Monday and was fab. She did not make the final round, but she dove really well and had fun with pool and school friends.

It was 11,000 degrees in the shade, but Minnie was a trooper

Last night was Jack's turn to shine at All-City, and boy did he! He got 9th in 15-19 boys and was awesome. He even banged his Apple watch on the diving board railing during in approach for his double pike and ended up leaving the board on two feet and still made the dive-- that's YEARS of diving experience right there.

He also got a brand new dive for finals-- a back 1.5 straight. It looks so cool the announcer actually SAID that was cool while he was under water:

There's an elementary school across the street from the host pool thank goodness, so Minnie had fun while the top 16 warmed up their finals dives, even though it was still 95 degrees and humid. Slight disaster when the snow cone truck was already gone when we got there-- averted by a trip to DQ on the way home-- phew!

After the meet, the kids all threw ridiculous stuff while the hosts got awards ready. I was too busy screaming belly flop to film Jack-- it was epic. 

Next year is Jack's LAST All-City meet if you can even believe that. And! OUR POOL IS HOSTING!! I can't wait (I even signed up to be on the host committee)-- how cool to have your SENIOR RECOGNITION for your favorite sport AT YOUR OWN POOOOOL!!!

Sorry about the weight loss triggers, everyone.

 I got a comment on Monday's post that really made me think:

"I have loved reading your blog for years but I feel like so much of your “health” writing reads as fat phobia. Obviously everyone gets to do what they want to do, but many nutritionists argue that intermittent fasting is just a way to justify/repackage disordered eating. I definitely wish you the best and know that all stages of menopause are god awful, but I hope you (and your family) know that you are worth far more than numbers on a scale or calorie counts. Thanks for the insight into your life over the years… I will sincerely miss reading but feel like it is more harmful than fun these days."

I am so sad that someone has decided not to come back to my blog because I am writing about weight loss-- but also I GET IT. I thought these same things as I wrote the weight loss posts-- diet culture, fat phobia, triggering people by talking about weight loss, all of it!

But! Is losing weight inherently fat phobic? How can I better talk about weight loss in a way that is not fat phobic? Is it ok for me to want to be thinner when I understand  the broader context of a diet culture that privileges thin bodies, how fundamentally fucked up it is that patriarchy demands women take up less space, etc?

My blood pressure is starting to go up, and my cholesterol is getting really high (this is a thing that happens in menopause? AS IF MENOPAUSE IS NOT ALREADY THE GD WORST). You guys know my dad died  at 71 from surgery to repair an aortic aneurysm. I am getting worried about my health and longevity at the same time I am gaining weight-- and visceral belly fat-- and seeing  those higher blood pressure and cholesterol numbers for the first time in my life. 

From my perspective, losing weight is healthy for me. At the same time, I understand that thinner does not mean healthier in all contexts. And! Weight loss is not my only (or even most important) goal. My goals are to lower my cholesterol and blood pressure, build muscle as I head into menopause, and maintain bone health (all my dorky wearable weights--thinking of wrist weights too...). Doing those things, though, is also resulting in weight loss. (Which I enjoy because I am a product of a fat phobic diet culture.)

Anyway-- I am sorry I sound fat phobic when writing about weight loss and health habits. 

And! I have also read about IF and eating disorders-- but I have also read about the benefits of IF, specifically for menopausal women... so I am giving it a shot. 

Harvard Health Watch July 2024

(And I mean searched my library's journal database for articles, not listened to a few internet nutrition coaches tell me what they think-- because social media health proselytizing is not for me. And! I see this on both sides of the coin-- really fit people who act like macros are morality AND ALSO popular internet advice about the evils of ANY KIND of nutrition and exercise plan) 

Because I am tracking macros, not calories, I am NOT starving myself eating from 10-6, and I've cut out my nighttime TV eating (and do not miss it). This doesn't mean I would cancel plans that fell outside my IF timeline-- I am not rigid about this in a weird way-- which is one of the warning signs that IF is leading to disordered eating. Eating in an 8-hour window DOES make it easier to eat less, and for an abstainer like me, eating after 6pm isn't even tempting any more.

It is easier for me to abstain than to moderate in all areas of my life, so I am worried about long term maintenance of health habits. Obviously, I will not abstain from added sugar forever. We are eating cake at least twice in August (probably more like 4 times given how many celebrations Minnie is planning for the big 0-5), and I adore baking. It will be a struggle, I think, to add in sweets without centering them in my diet again because it is really hard for me to just have a little or just have one-- even when I eat it mindfully and enjoy the experience.

For a long time, I was telling myself that I was "practicing intuitive eating" but I was really just eating whatever whenever under that guise-- which is not healthy for me in terms of cholesterol, blood pressure, sodium intake-- no matter how accepting of my physical body I tried to be. (not very-- I am a product of diet culture).

Anyway, this whole thing falls under the doth protest too much umbrella,I guess. Sorry for the triggers on my Monday posts, everyone.

Health Streak Update: Week 3

 I found THESE peanut butter cups at Costco, and I am a YUGE fan.

I got some bleach on my pink hotty hots, so I ordered a new pair in the same size, and they're TOO BIG! (I am keeping them because they were final sale because I bought the clearance color, even though I could return them for store credit, but honestly $50 is all I want to spend on work out shorts anyway, so I would probably not exchange them since the non-clearance color is $70, and they're not that big).

(Also, next time I will get the 2.5 inch inseam, not the 4).

(Also also do you love dorky, dorky ankle weights?)

I am still down 14 pounds **whomp whomp** no more weight loss this week, so I am going to look even harder at nutrition next week. I have started putting chocolate milk in my coffee again-- which is probably knocking out the intermittent fasting benefits. I also am going to try apple cider vinegar gummies and a packet of Zena super greens (bought at Costco; nobody else likes them) along with my fiber supplement, B6, and fish oil. Maybe this will help me feel fuller longer and not eat all of the things for breakfast. 

If you are someone who wants more servings of fruit and veggies and also wants to remember to drink more water, these little super greens packets might be good for you. I eat enough fruits and veggies without them, but they can't HURT, and because I am not eating added sugar, they taste unbelievably sweet and delicious to me (SO SAD YOU GUYS. I look forward to those apple cider gummies like they are ACTUAL CANDY.)

Still walking all over the hood with Annabel in my dorky weighted glory and still doing a strength workout every day and also cardio. I like this routine and may keep it going forever. I used to take weekends off, but that adds up to ... a lot of time off.

Long term plans: I think I am ready to join a gym so I can lift larger weights, get a personalized strength plan from a trainer, and have access to group fitness classes. Ben and I are going to look at some when he gets home from California because he is also interested in those benefits, and we would like Cooper to lift with a trainer. I am also going to find a place to take a couple of barre and yoga classes a week now that Minnie will be in kindergarten, and I will have time to do things for myself. A NEW ERA.

I just cooked a bunch of lentils and also sauteed diced sweet potatoes and chopped kale in olive oil, garlic, pepper, and curry powder. I think I will eat all of these things together with black beans and some sort of spicy greek yogurt sauce as burritos until I get sick of them, and think I am going to make some (modified to make it lower calorie) copycat Whole Foods chicken salad to eat for the rest of the week.

For me, the key to meeting health goals is to make sure I have high protein and fiber food options prepped and ready to go. I adore Oikos triple zero yogurt when I am looking for something treaty. I cannot get enough almond butter and cosmic crisp apples, and I am now someone who looks forward to a few dried apricots and handful of pecans. WHO EVEN AM I YOU GUYS?

 

5 on a Friday: Notes from a 7-hour pool day

 1. Yes, the title of this post is accurate. Cooper's club diving practice got canceled (this last week before the team leaves for nationals has been a real shit show), and Dorothy was at dance ALL DAY, so Cooper, Minnie, and I went to the pool at 2 pm and stayed until close at 9. Well, I took a break to grab Minnie a change of suit (chafing), and she and I grabbed Dorothy at 7pm and brought her back for the final 2 hours-- but still 2pm-9pm AT THE POOOOL.

2. I read So Far Gone and liked it well enough. I think I really wanted Richard Russo to be writing it, though (especially the buddy dialogue), and there was a really odd mix of granular action and then sweeping exposition. 

3. Coop's national team joined us for a couple hours, and the kids ran all of their dives over and over again and played smallest splash with a running score. They asked whatever lifeguard was in the deep end to judge the splash, and a large group of little kids congregated to scream out scores. It was darling.

4. I did no house work, though, and didn't even fold the day's laundry, super unfortch because I changed Jack and Coop's sheets, blankets, and duvet covers. (I mean, no  housework is not accurate because I did clean all the bathrooms and make sure all the bedrooms were tidy-- something I do first thing every morning-- and I swept the kitchen floor and prepped the coffee, etc, after we got home).

5. Minnie is totally self sufficient in the deep end, and I never have to go in the pool ever again-- UNLESS I WANT TO.

I was worried about needing to wash my hair because of all the sunscreen and sweat, but this $10 scarf might have saved the day!

Coop and friends did this for literal HOURS

Suit change!

Exhausted

Fave shot of the day